APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

a journal of edgy extrapolations, fringe fascinations, occult obsessions, risky ruminations, and aberrant associations.

TWO LIVES

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

It’s an April night, so it still gets cold. Fern’s arms are goosebumpy, spiky, he feels like a hedgehog. He’s sitting on a bench under a white light. The white light makes colors stand out. His t-shirt is really orange. The bench is really brown. His hair is really blonde. A man in a handsome blue TWO LIVES

“RAZING THE DEAD”

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

I was a ship inside a bottle.I had to collapse my backto pick my spot atop the clay. Sometimes I watch videosof African wildlife battlingfor survival. Painted dogsand hyenas and lions. Gazelle with broken legscollapse in the dirt while theirloved ones run away. A lawyer once made funof me for being a door man.It stung “RAZING THE DEAD”

DUNGEONS

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

And it is not only by external enemies that I am threatened. There are also enemies in the bowels of the earth.— Franz Kafka, The Burrow There’s a hole in the wall—an inexplicable fist-sized hole—right behind where Mr. Phillips is sitting. It wasn’t there yesterday, or the day before, or whenever Lenore was last in DUNGEONS

“EIGHT MINUTES AFTER FIRST SIGHT” – “BREAKING GROUND ON NEW DERINKUYU” – “DREAMING BEYOND THIS HARDENED PLANE”

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

Eight Minutes After First Sight I. Eight Turn infinity on its endto make a figure eight: magnetic orbits twist,emitting flares of deadly light. II. Minutes Eight times sixty, counted twice:by the conscience and the clock. Warning klaxons stabthe seconds mercilessly— sitting ducks— III. After After several immolations,scientists determined why. Atmospheric degradationboring holes into our sky— “EIGHT MINUTES AFTER FIRST SIGHT” – “BREAKING GROUND ON NEW DERINKUYU” – “DREAMING BEYOND THIS HARDENED PLANE”

THIS CLUB IS PRIVATE

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

He finds it in the paper, of all places. Among listings for yard sales and liquidations that no one sees, there it is, a help wanted post. A few vague lines, no experience needed, just the right disposition and an ability to pour drinks.  Knox shows up with the paper in hand, as if they THIS CLUB IS PRIVATE

HE WAS A SOUND SOMETIMES

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

There was one show, one of the very first shows we played in London, in this place called Vox, and at the middle of the set, it was quite the perfect point, actually, with a really long build up to a loud noise, then when we got into the most intense part the fuses blew HE WAS A SOUND SOMETIMES

“OBSTINATE ECHO SCARE QUOTE SENTENCE POEM” – “THE CRUSH/ADORABLE FEARS”

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

Obstinate Echo Scare Quote Sentence Poem HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE HAVE “OBSTINATE ECHO SCARE QUOTE SENTENCE POEM” – “THE CRUSH/ADORABLE FEARS”

“THE CARES OF SHADOW HEAVING THEE”

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

The cares of shadow heaving theeunshakable torture glittered on Apolloeverything was followed by the swiftlyturning bladeshe changed gradually intodamp tights and small whirring engineinvisible in the white washed room The rays that flame ammoniareplaced this planet with dark flowersbutterflies bridge the riverradioactive baby held living treethe robin’s suffocating gazedancer sped through machines and inhabitedburning African “THE CARES OF SHADOW HEAVING THEE”

THE STAMPEDE

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

Once again, I dreamt of elephants flattening a jungle canopy while my daughter Melyda trailed behind them across the clearing they created. When I jarred awake in the darkness, my new bride slept beside me and I remembered that we were honeymooning in the Movie Colony of Palm Springs at Las Palomas, the former desert THE STAMPEDE

“THE GUN LOOKS WRONG”

APOCALYPSE CONFIDENTIAL

The gun looks wrong,you know what I mean? Two-tone gray – cubicle gray,rubber shoe sole gray – anda cadmium trigger. Deadred-orange. Simple as a stapler. Nintendo calls it The Zapper.No one calls it that. It’s just the gun. A duck soars and you shoot it,dead in the sky. A doggrabs its neck, holds it limp,an “THE GUN LOOKS WRONG”